Men and Women.......



I don't normally do Monday posts as the weekend is never that interesting, however a good 1-0 away win for the Mighty Blues at Middlesbrough warmed things up after a top night in Old Pub on Friday (New Pub still hasn't worked out what the fuck it needs to get the real locals in) and a semi-decent game of golf yesterday capped off a nice relaxing weekend. Told you it was dull but I like dull...dull is good...dull means no nasty surprises.



Anyway, my thanks to Private Godfrey for this - its probably done the rounds but I haven't seen it before.



How to make a woman happy?



It's really not difficult... To make a woman happy; a man only needs to be :

1. a friend

2. a companion

3. a lover

4. a brother

5. a father

6. a master

7. a chef

8. an electrician

9. a carpenter

10. a plumber

11. a mechanic

12. a decorator

13. a stylist

14. a sexologist

15. a gynaecologist

16. a psychologist

17. a pest exterminator

18. a psychiatrist

19. a healer

20. a good listener

21. an organiser

22. a good father

23. very clean

24. sympathetic

25. athletic

26. warm

27. attentive

28. gallant

29. intelligent

30. funny

31. creative

32. tender

33. strong

34. understanding

35. tolerant

36. prudent

37. ambitious

38. capable

39. courageous

40. determined

41. true

42. dependable

43. passionate



All this WITHOUT forgetting to:

44. give her compliments regularly

45. love shopping

46. be honest

47. be very rich

48. not stress her out

49. not look at other girls



And at the same time you MUST also:

50. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself

51. give her lots of time, especially time for herself

52. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes



It is VERY important to:

53. Never to forget: * birthdays* anniversaries* arrangements she makes



How to make man happy? :



1. Shag him

2. Leave him in peace



I did think of some others that make a man happy such as "don't ask for a cuddle after a shag" or don't ask him for some of his chips. I'm sure there are probably more....



Later, GrocerJack